Well, sort of. Minus the wings.
Enter Ye Olde Linda and Nicki Are Quitting Like Right Now
It's more than that I am a miserable salesperson (I really, really am). It's more than that Connie is a bitch. It's more than that John is a huge asshole. It's that I suck and that John and Connie are assholes together
, and the fact that John is constantly talking shit about Linda, who is my friend, and has never ONCE done a fucking thing to anyone except warn people that Connie is a bitch and not to let her fuck you over.
It's Connie blaming the gross misspellings in the customer database on Linda, when we all know Connie can't even spell "states." Or "Arthur." I can't tell you how many instances of "King Auther Court" I've seen.
(Not to mention that when she finagled a WH account out of me when I first started (my SECOND DAY), she spelled both my first and last names wrong.
It's John promising this poor woman that he would order a watch for her, and my having to apologize and cover for him because he never got back to her. I don't know what all he's done, she's not even my customer, and I am not apologizing for anyone else's bullshit anymore.
It's me always getting stuck working 12-hour shifts because someone calls out. Fuck this, honestly. I am not doing it again. Period. Or I quit, right on the spot.
It's Connie pouring more water into the ultrasonic machine instead of, I dunno, cleaning out the crud that has accumulated in the bottom of it.
It's Connie calling me over from 10+ feet away, where I was busy doing something, to get something out of a drawer that was maybe two feet away from her.
It's Alison installing the new copier/fax machine and Connie taking all the credit for it (and John GIVING it to her) (like Connie even knows how to spell "fax").
It's Connie padding her transaction totals.
It's Connie STILL swiping everyone's sales.
It's John swiping Christina's $100 sale.
It's John swiping my returns.
It's John's terrible halitosis.
It's John letting Connie get away with riding the clock and everything else because she "does a lot for [him]."
It's the Secret Cabinet bullshit (Alison: "John, I was cleaning out these cabinets, but I can't open this one with my keys." John: "No, you can't.").
It's standing for five hours in silence with John and seriously contemplating pretending to pass out so I can go home.
It's John staring at Alison's chest.
It's...shit, Alison told us something really amazing today and I've completely forgotten it.
Ah, well, I could go on, but I think you get the idea.
The last two jobs I poked at had already been filled (thus I was angry) (and it sucks being angry where you can't post to LJ about it. /emo tear By the time I get home, I'm not pissed anymore).
But it's okay, at the very least I've got a backup. I think Cobra Commander and the Marquis de Brock Samson might give me an in.
Also, I love Jon Benjamin forever and ever and ever.